Sunday, January 01, 2006

Wedding Crashers

I can't remember being so conflicted while watching a movie.

There's two radically different storylines in this movie. One storyline, the one with Vince Vaughn's character is hilarious, one of the funniest movies of the year.

Then..... unfortunately there's the other storyline with Owen Wilson's character, which is horrible, unwatchable, and insulting. Seriously a movie that's so bad that one may want to pluck their own eyes out.

It's not that Owen Wilson is bad, it's that he's given so little to work with. It's the worst kind of Pg-13 romantic comedy stuff that makes people want to ask for their money back. At one point during a stereotypical montage Owen Wilson's character, and a likeable Rachel McAdams are riding their bikes through a field with baby goats surrounding them.

I'm not lying baby fucken goats.

I haven't seen a major movie star being so blatantly upstaged since Johnny Depp's Captain Sparrow carried Orlando Bloom's character in Pirates of Carribean. It's unfortunate cause we know Owen Wilson can be funny.

What's worse is that the stuff that's SUPPOSSED to be funny in Owen Wilson's storyline is mean-spirited, and obnoxious. Half the storyline is Owen Wilson getting his ass kicked by Rachel McAdams' nightmare of a boyfriend. It's a horrible device to put Owen Wilson's character in a good light. Lazy, immature, horrible writing that made me want to kick my high definition t.v. through the wall.

I don't know who invented the rule that the love interest had to have the most obnoxious, rude, and disgusting partner while being pursued by the protagonist, but that person needs to be shot, seriously hanged, and then the head. Sure the device gains sympathy for the protagonist, but it makes the love interest look like a freaking retarded idiot. Why would the protagonist want to be with someone so fucken blind and stupid? Not to mention it makes no sense! Great, smart, attractive, woman don't hang out with dumb, obnoxious guys unless the girl is poor and needs money, the guy is good looking or famous, or if the girl had their life and her parents life saved by the guy.

The only real reason to watch the movie is for Vince Vaughn.

The guy has been funny in a lot of movies, but he really breaks out in this movie. He's really brillant, he's fast talking, likeable and razor sharp. He's also pretty dangerous, his character is wildly unpredictable, and perverted. It's really, really funny stuff. I just wish there was more of it. To me it felt like a guy had the remote control while I was watching Curb your Enthusiasm and kept flipping it to Scrubs. I'd wet myself laughing and then the guy would flip the channel to Scrubs and I'd get pissed and depressed and he'd switch it back to Curb.

Which brings me to a great idea, someone out there has to put Vaughn in a Curb your Enthusiasm type show where they just get out of the way, and let Vince Vaughn do his thing. He's old school vaudville funny, he can turn any line into a hilarious punchline, and knock it out of the park. The first 15 minutes of the movie in particular is classic, hilarious stuff as they show Wilson and Vaughn crashing weddings.

Then the fun begins to fade badly. Like when the funny, likeable, drunk friend at a party starts to get sick, and throw up while pissing his pants.

I don't know why one would make a movie called Wedding Crashers and then only spend 15 minutes showing the characters doing it. But it's a real let down. To me it feels like the studio had a good idea for a movie trailer, then realized a little late in the game they needed to make a two hour movie.

After the first 20 minutes the movie down shifts from fifth gear to park. It just stops dead, especially when Vince Vaughn is not on screen. It's pointless, absurd, bad network sitcom stuff, that's just not funny. I've heard reviews saying it's hilarious from beginning to end, and I wonder what movie they watched cause I didn't see it.

I was really looking forward to this one, and I can't really recommend it. The only way I'd recommend watching it is if one fast forwarded through any scene without Vince Vaughn.

One hand on the remote, which is hardly a way to watch a movie.

1 comment:

Lons said...

I had a screenwriting professor once caution me...When you first come up with the idea you want to write, consider what aspect it is about the idea that appeals to you most, and then spend most of the script actually writing that material.

This film clearly SHOULD focus on the two guys going to weddings and hooking up with girls. Of course, it has to have some sort of a plot, but whatever lame story you come up with, the focus should remain on the guys and their wedding techniques. Instead, the movie gets sidetracked with lame "Meet the Parents" stuff and it gets incredibly dull really fast.